i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
