it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
