ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
