SEEEEXXX PLEASE
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
