Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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