Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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