can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
