I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
you never un-have a 4some
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
