In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
