alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
