So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize