Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
