remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Randomize
