i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
