Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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