we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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