and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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