i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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