He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
