He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize
