Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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