There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
