I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
