I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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