and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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