I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
