butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
