I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize