yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
mondays should just be called national damage control day
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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