If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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