At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
is it fun? or sober?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
