Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
