I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
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