well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Operation Purity has been aborted
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
