remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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