Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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