You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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