I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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