please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
