she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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