Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
