idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Randomize