Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
