super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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