that's an acceptable place to lick
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize