Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
