went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
