Do you still have your period?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
