like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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