There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Well I just put wine in my tea
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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