I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
